The Official Guide to Pinocchio and FooT Characters!

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Amazing Paflyman!
Greetings loyal reader! Not a day goes by without some ardent Pinocchio and FooT fan asking me: who are those weird characters in that pervo webcomic at

So, I've created this exciting guide to the amazing characters in the beloved Pinocchio and FooT Comic.

Pinocchio Pinocchiooooooooooooooo!
The greatest comic hero of all time, as you well know loyal reader, is Pinocchio! His heroic jaw, wispy hair, and grand proboscis make Superman and Batman slouch with shame!

Pinocchio is a master detective who solves the most complicated of mysteries for a special department of the Salt Lake Police called the Big Nose Division. Traumatized by a Mysterious Pinocchio Make-Up kit as a child, Pinocchio has sworn to rid Salt Lake of all evil-doers.

His secret, everyday alter ego is Richard Olson, whose occupation is subject to an intense debate among the reader of Pinocchio and FooT! Is he a reporter for some yellow rag, or a famous nose surgeon? The Department of Continuity desperately wants to know!

FooT is the most loveable comic character since Lucy van Pelt. His sleek physique is instantly recognizable to our loyal reader!

Foot has developed the amazing power of the Buddha Belch learned from a secret sect of Alaskan Buddhist Monks who follow the non-traditional nine-fold path and guard the Sacred Sanctuary of the Buddha Charana Naasaabhyantara.

Matt Rowley, FooT's secret identity, is a wealthy real estate tycoon whose wealth originated from the ownership of a chain of pizzerias and later the Retrogration Market chain.

FooT currently resides in Alaska with his wife Brittany Jaylo Jackson Rowley. He moved to Alaska after Pinocchio gave him a terrible nose job.

He is also the world's worst pool player.

Erik the Ferret Erik the Ferret was the first evildoer to face Pinocchiooo!

Usually dressed in a business suit like a cheap gangster, Ferret occasionally appears wearing a fur cape and a hat, which is either shaped as, or actually is, the head of a ferret.

Lately Ferret has appeared in a t-shirt emblazoned with the name "Muddwench Tech."

Ferret originally appeared to be a classic crime boss as one might find in the Mafia, that is, if they weren't Sicilian and they had a fascination with ferrets. Now he seems to have morphed into a mad-scientist, and is running for Mayor of Salt Lake City.

Ferret's fascination with ferrets is only exceeded by his fascination with Sheri, the Classy Dame, who is also referred to as the Majorette and appears in P&F No. 5 dressed as some kind of cheerleader. Alas, the Classy Dame left Ferret when he lost his hair during a well-deserved stint in the Utah State Penitentiary.

Chief Inspector Boogart has been a member of the Salt Lake City Police Department for longer than anyone can remember. His current assignment is to head the Big Nose Division, which serves as the official liason between the City of Salt Lake and its greatest hero, Pinocchiooo!

Boogart's main job is to summon the dynamic dunderheads via the Burp Phone, pretending astonishment at Pinocchio's ludicrous leaps of "logic", and cleaning up his office after explosions in Dr. Brown's lab.

Boogart in no way resembles Commissioners Dolan or Gordon, by the way.

Who is this munchkin like figure????
Who is this mysterious Munchkin-like figure, anyway?

Cool hat, though.

Under construction! More to come!